A Letter to my niece <3
A long time coming, almost 9 years to be exact that you came into my life and made the world a better place. 1st niece to enter the family and you will never know how truly magical you made our lives. I had/have so many dreams of the things we would be able to do together, the amount of precious time we would have to live, laugh and love. The little time I get to be with you, I soak it up with all my heart, I make sure you are the most loved, cherished and respected human being, because you shouldn't feel anything less. You are becoming such a beautiful lady inside out and you will be that soul that makes everyone around feel the brightness. I am in awe of the strength and courage you have at such a young age being put in situations you should never have to deal with, EVER. I hope you remember since the day you were born, we all gave it our best and tried to make things work in the best way possible, but sometimes it is out of our hands. Just know you will always be loved, cherished and accepted with open arms no matter what happens in this life. I will always be there to make sure you can be whoever you want to be without judgment, you can be free and accepted, you precious soul.
You are definitely more girly than me but I live for the days we can go get our nails done on the regular, we can do each others make up, well you could do mine since I know you will excel at it, we can go dress shopping and just shopping in general. I can vision us trying on so many outfits and just diving into the beauty of our souls, our connection and of course how drop dead gorgeous we both look. I want you to be whoever you want to be, I want you to dive into yourself and figure out exactly what you want, not what someone else wants. I want you to be the kid who stands up for every other child out there who is having a hard time, I don't know since I am rarely in your life but I have a good feeling you are and I am so proud of you. The days I get to spend with you and your brother are the best days of my life, where we can have the best times enjoying each others company, endless laughter and don't have to have a worry in the world. Whether we are playing hide and go seek, running up an down grandpa and grandma's hallway, making slime, perfume, bath bombs and running around. Those days are my absolute most precious days that I get to live and appreciate fully.
When we get to spend more time together, I want to spoil you 1st with love and attention spending time that we will never get back going to get our nails done, spending the whole day together doing whatever we feel like doing, more than just material things. You are worth more than any material or money out there so the time I get with you has no value, its absolutely priceless. I wish things were different sometimes but this has made me grow and become a better person even though it has broken my heart times and times again, but I am strong like you. I will keep fighting because at the end of the day it is not about me or anyone else, it will always be about you and your brother. You are the two out of this world children that matter, should be put first and I will continually do that. Your mental and physical health mean the world to me and I will continue to make sure that you feel that whole heartedly. The time I spend with you, you are the center of attention, nothing else and no one else. I will never make you choose, just know you are always loved and I will be here whenever you need, doesn't matter what is going on in my life, I will drop everything to make sure you are okay.
I want nothing but the best for you and your brother, I want you to forever love your mom and dad, they will always love you. The relationships you build with them are something else so always cherish, love and appreciate them, no matter what circumstance. Your mom is doing the best she can and knows how, she is a beautiful human and I have the most love and kindness for her. I am not her to steal you or take you away from your mom or dad or other family, that has never crossed my mind ever. Your dad is doing the best he can with what he is given as well, we all lead lives the no one else knows so always choose love and kindness, even if hurtful times are ahead. The way we break a cycle is with love and kindness, remember that. I hear all the time from people in my life "how much I bring to their children's life" that I hope I do the same for you and your brother, that's all I want.
School in itself can be so horrible to children, mental health and all so I don't want to put anymore burden in your life where you have to choose. I am here forever and ever, I will never put any more pressure on you. Whenever I get to see you next, best believe you and your brother are always put first and we will be surrounded by love, fun and laughter. You may not be able to read this now but one day, you will know how much we gave it our all.
Love you two more than you will ever know and I will continually show when I get the chance. < 3
Whoever is going through a rough time, just remember things will get better because there is people out there who like yourself Kaiya, will share this love and kindness to every soul out there.